I’m Not A Girl?!

Yeah. How would you feel?

Several months ago Ben and I were talking and he mentioned how I’m not a girl.

I suppose it’s because I don’t handle situations like a girl. Honestly, I wouldn’t really know how a girl would handle whatever. I suppose cry and pout til she gets her way/attention etc?

A few weeks ago my brother and I were discussing a certain girl and some drama happening. My brother made the comment, ”Β Dude, she’s a REAL girl!”

Me: Oh is there such a thing as a fake girl?!

I should’ve known better

John: Yes! You are so not a girl. You’re a guy.

Me: Well great. Here’s another guy thinking the same thing…

Relaying this newfound information to a friend during chat..

me:Β  I’m not a girl according to my brother and ben.

A-REI: I’ve thought that at times…
but i appreciate that about you πŸ™‚

me: OMG YOU TOO?!?!?!

A-REI: lol
me: I’m being serious…seriously you think that?

A-REI: um… that sometimes you are not as girly as others?Β Β  yes
i don’t think you are a guy
that’s weird…

Unfortunately, we got to the side of the conversation where I’m seen as a guy because they’re comfortable with me, etc. Honestly, I never show a guy that I can be a romantic interest because I don’t want just anyone giving me the time of day and I most definitely don’t give just anyone the time of day.

Now that I think of it, I believe only two guys have seen “girlfriend/wife prospect” Melanie. Ex-bf and pf.

While we’re on this subject, I cannot flirt. What does flirting consist of anyway? Yes, I’m a girl because I am more than capable to connive, manipulate, and deceive- I choose not to, unless you’re a girl using the aforementioned tactics towards me. You will get schooled, btw.

Back on track, (not like we were on track towards anything anyway) not a girl=Melanie. I suppose if that’s what it seems like then so be it. I am who I am because of what I have learned through observations and experiences.

Is it so bad that I live in reality? Or that I am independent and opinionated? I suppose the man I date/(eventually) marry would like to know I am more than capable of stepping alongside him instead of pulling him along?

Are people supposed to know that about you right off the bat? To my understanding, that just means you’re on the radar for an MRS degree. It screams “PLEASE MARRY ME BECAUSE I’M 21 WITHOUT ANY PROSPECTS”

I know, I’m to act and behave womanly and lady-like, etc, which is most definitely not equivalent to being a girl in my eyes. Am I wrong here or do I just live in Melanie-land?

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5 thoughts on “I’m Not A Girl?!

  1. You’re funny, Mel! I have never thought of you as less girly simply because you don’t act like other girls. Honestly, that’s why I’m friends with you! Besides, I’m probably a lot less girly than you…

  2. You’re not wrong and you’re also not living in you’re own little world. I married my wife because she isn’t like other girls. She has her womanly side but she doesn’t act like your typical female. There are lots of guys, I’m sure, that appreciate that in a woman, don’t you worry. Just be yourself, and as you said “live in reality” not a place where you’re expected to be “girly”.

  3. I’d take those comments as a compliment. In this time when equality between men and women is finally making some headway, I think that it is plain silly that a strong, opinionated, independent woman would automatically be thought of us being a guy. We can just scoff at society and rejoice that you go against the grain! πŸ™‚

  4. Your title really caught my eye and I just had to comment.

    I agree with Yasmine. I think that this criteria is silly. I’ve always erred on the tomboy side of things, and am drawn to women who aren’t typical girly-girls (not that there’s anything wrong with girly-girls.) Just because you act outside of what some people consider “girly” doesn’t make you less of a girl. I think it just means that you haven’t found a man who also finds said qualities in you attractive. I think often times men are drawn to girls who are very dramatic and showy on the surface because it seems very feminine… but in truth, many times these gals are also needy and insecure underneath. Attraction to this might be fun in the short term, but it rarely lasts and it’s rarely fulfilling. I know plenty of men who appreciate an intelligent, strong, etc. etc. woman because she is contains these qualities WHILE still being feminine… but it sometimes takes them a bit to figure that out. πŸ™‚

    All that to say: just be you. That’s what’s so winsome. πŸ™‚

  5. It’s almost as if people classify each other, and for you to fit in their criteria, you have to behave accordingly. just because you don’t behave like most girls, that you;re different, doesn’t at all mean you are not a girl…embrace what you have, be yourself.. ok? πŸ™‚

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