Boy, do me a favor, PLEASE!

I’ve had my share of dates the past month. One of the things that really irk me is that guys don’t really study up on a girl when they are given a chance. You can see my in my element, my environment. Me talking with my friends, me talking with adults, me sitting by myself, me playing with the kids. You can kinda get a feel of who i am. Do a little psycho-analysis. Please.

 

This is for all the guys that don’t want to do the homework…

Oh, me helping you means you’ve just slid into the friend category. Sorry 😦

 

Please talk intelligently. I’m not asking you to use big words; I’m asking you to use complete sentences. We were taught what complete sentences consist of in grade school. We have practiced complete sentences all our lives, do not start now to talk in incomplete sentences. I do not care if it’s a simple, complex, compound, complex-compound sentence; just make sure it is a sentence.

Do not make fun of other people in front of me. I have a sense of humor but my sense of humor does not consist of making fun of another or stepping on another person to put self above another. Some people are very witty. If you don’t know what witty means or what it consists of: you’re not witty and that means I don’t think you’re funny.

Do not buy me with your money. I always try to believe it’s the thought that counts. Anyone can flash around money and throw it down for everyone else. I notice when you’ve put thought into a gift or a date. Anyone can pick a place and pay for it but it really takes time and effort to make a date memorable but enjoyable.

Don’t refer to me as “man/dude”. Better yet don’t use the words “man/dude/bro”, etc in your conversation. I hardly use those words when I converse with you please do the same.

I just want to help, let me. I don’t know what it is with guys and not letting me plug-in the address to a gps so we can quickly start driving to our destination. I just want to help, I’m not trying to take over. Don’t be offended when I take something out of your already full hands, I know you are capable but I just want to help. I’m not expecting you to be perfect and mr. macho man. If that’s what you want to be though, you’re trying to woo the wrong girl.

Do not mock me. If there is one thing I hate is being mocked. The next thing I hate is being mocked with a high girly pitched voice.

Get your focus of yourself, now. Stop worrying if I like you or if you’re doing it all wrong because you are. I look for friends. I want a friend before I attach boy to the beginning of the word ‘friend’. If you won’t be my friend first and allow me to talk nonstop about stupid things and let me get comfortable around you, it will not work. EVER. Then you won’t notice that I’m really quiet and answer with mono-syllabic answers. You won’t notice that I haven’t answered your text 3 hours later. When I start talking to you again it means you’ve slid further away from boyfriend material and into friend category.

Sometimes, I want you to let me be. People have bad days. I do not need you to try to make me laugh. I just want you to listen to me vent or to just talk about something else other than my situation. I don’t need you to make me laugh. If you really wanted to brighten my day we would go do something. It doesn’t have to be fancy but something little, simple, and nice.

Do not say the same joke over and over again. After you’ve said it the second time, it’s no longer funny. After you’ve said it for 3 weeks in a row, I will hit the delete contact on my phone, Facebook, email, etc. Every now and then repeat the joke but every time we hang out? Get another joke and use it once.

Lastly, but the most important, Do NOT try to impress me. You WILL fail. It irks me to no end. It rubs me the wrong way. I will start to ignore you. I will run away when I see you.

 

So, this is the basics of Melanie. I know, it’s far from basic but that’s why I’m still single. Honest, I’m not hard to please; I just want and need to know: I’m worth it-he risk of being wooed and courted even if it doesn’t work out between us. Call me old-fashioned but that’s me, Melanie.

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6 thoughts on “Boy, do me a favor, PLEASE!

  1. Pingback: Boy, do me a favor, PLEASE! Pt 2 « The past to the present

    • Just remember, dating is the BEGINNING to getting to know someone. It should also be fun but too often it`s like an interview. Whatever happened `what ever happens happens`or `just go with the flow and see how things go`.
      Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again. 🙂

  2. Bro, nice post. But we don’t need help. My BMW is all I need, which is more than that poor boy from your other posts has ha! Also, I bought you tickets… to the gun show *flex*. Yea picked them up after I saved like 18 babies from a burning building. Yea just another heroism badge from the police department, whatevs. Man I’m good at this. Did I mention I bought you tickets?

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