Day 19 Of Honesty

Day 19 — The film that best describes how my day-to-day life feels is…

I must confess I needed help on this one. So, I asked my boyfriend, the film guru. Anyway, he suggested Despicable Me… at first I was like, WHAT? Then he explained… well your family is pretty crazy and you deal with them everyday…

The more I thought about it the more I agreed. My family is crazy and they are definitely a handful. My siblings can be overbearing all the time  sometimes to the point that when they ask me to take them somewhere I drop them off and leave I am somehow coerced into staying and spending money on them.

I suppose you can say I come off as Gru. Completely evil except when it comes to my family; I will run you over.  I will definitely stand up for them and fight their fight for them or alongside them.

At the end of the day, I shake my head at them but inside I’m grateful for them.

 

To start things off…

I’ve written quite a bit about my family. To start things off I’ll write about two comical snippets of my sibling life.

Sunday night
I’m laying in bed all of a sudden I hear my brother,
John: who is online?!
Me: [check phone, omg I’m online! Hurry up and disconnect]
Me: sorry John. I turned off my wifi.
Sister: laughing her head off in her room (next door to mine)
Me: dude, shut up dar. Sorry John I keep forgetting.
Sister: still laughing her head off.

We find out quite a bit later it was my mom on Facebook LOL.

Last night…
My mom, brother, and sister are in the kitchen. My mom tells my sister to empty out the dishwasher. A few minutes later I hear my sister and brother arguing about chores…
John: don’t even dar mom told you to do it!
Mom: I told you to do it Darlene.
A few minutes later Darlene is in the bathroom washing up and John checks to see if she cleaned out the dishwasher.

John: when I get to heaven I’m going to find out how many times she lied to me about doing chores!

I can’t stop laughing.

Dar joins us and I relay the message to her.
Dar: no! You’ll forget!

John: no I won’t! he mumbles under his breathe to me … [ dude how many times has she lied??]

A Beautiful Day Calls for a Photo Shoot

All Photos Taken By Darlene Torres

Rodeo Drive, Beverly Hills

Improvised Art

Expensive Toys

Los Angeles, CA from Griffith Observatory

Walking around Rodeo Drive

All photos taken by Darlene Torres

Boy, do me a favor, PLEASE! Pt 2

This is one of those posts that will continue… Click here to read the first post 

Do not text me if you’re planning to ask me out. Call me. Ask me in person. If you text me I’ll take it as a casual “Let’s hang out, friend” 

 

Yes, I expect you to pay. You asked me out. I’m taking time out of my schedule to “entertain’ you. You pay. If you would rather go dutch, let me call my girls to join me.

 

I see you ogling the girl. I’m not blind or stupid. I know when it’s a glance and a stare. 1+ looks are considered staring/ogling.

 

I hate hearing the word trust. Sadly but honestly, you are guilty until you are proven innocent. That’s how it goes with me.

 

Be a player and I will never talk to you again. I have high standards for friends and I have even higher standards for potential boyfriends. If you’re a player, you’re not my friend and will never be my boyfriend.

 

Don’t waste my time. If you don’t know what you are doing with your life and you aren’t even making steps to find out what you want to do, stop talking to me.

 

Call me. If you don’t want to be considered a bother then text me and ask if you can call tonight.. If you never text or sometimes text and you never call me, you and I are just friends.

 

Consider this a warning or a challenge: You have competition that already have priority in my life. My dad, my brother, my cousins, and my guy friends. They have set the bar and I love them dearly. You are required to stand out from the rest of them or you’re just another friend.

Awww…you’re such a good brother!

My brother knows about my bucket list. This past Saturday he experienced what I had to go through on my casual date this past week. We all hung out as a group. My family was there and a bunch of my sister’s friends. Today my brother sends me a text:

 

11:43 am Bro: I know going on a blind date to knotts isn’t really what you want but too bad it’s what works haha april 16th if everything works out

ME: huh? blind date? lol

Bro: Nvm

ME: What? What are you talking about? I know you want to go to KBF but you never mentioned blind date

Bro: I know I was planning one for you but it didn’t work out

Me:: aw…..:: tears…::

ME: Hahahaha awwww… you’re such a good brother lol 🙂

Bro: I know :p haha

Me: Dork so what happened? Why didn’t it work out? Haha

Honestly, I was wanting to know how my brother would explain wanting to set his older sister on a blind date. Personally, I think the dude would’ve been freaked out and like Why in the world does this girl need her little brother setting her up on blind dates?! Right?! Anyway I digress.

Bro: He kinda likes someone. He’s a youth pastor. I guess he’s busy? And I don’t think he’s into blind dates??

Me: Omg lol who is this guy??

Bro: Blind date called blind dates for a reason =P

They basically didn’t want him.

I work at a school district  in the Nutrition/Food Service department. This department processes applications to free/reduced lunch.

The other day this lady calls and is asking about her ‘child’. He is considered a foster child.

We had to call her back and tell her to fill out an application at the district office so it can be processed later that afternoon and her child will be able to start receiving free lunch. My co-worker began to ask her questions.

The foster child is her grandson.

Co-worker: What happened to his parents?

Grandma: They basically didn’t want him. They were druggies.

Co-Worker: Oh my goodness really? That’s so sad.

Grandma: His mom had custody over him and she wouldn’t feed him. She would leave him alone for 4-5 hours everyday. She taped the refrigerator shut so he couldn’t eat anything.

Co-Worker: That’s horrible.

Grandma: I plan on keeping him. She can’t have him back. His dad is no better either. If she has another one, I’m going to kill her.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

After the conversation we started talking about that subject. How do some “parents” not even care? How can they leave their infant unattended for so long?

Personally, I’m sickened by some people and their selfishness. How selfish can someone be? What possesses one to completely neglect their child instead of seeking help? Even animals don’t forsake their babies.

When I was younger up until I started dating my Junior year in college, I didn’t want children. I babysit children and took care of them-fed them, played with them, etc. They weren’t even my children but I still made sure they were fed. They were happy. They were clean. It’s insane when you really think about it. I never had to FORCE myself to take care of them even through my laziness or frustration in watching 3 kids at one time…they still were getting that necessary attention.

 

So tell me, how does one become so twisted and psycho that they cannot take care of their child?

Delayed Gratification…

This past weekend life threw one of its many curve balls. . . Sickness, pain, suffering, were among everyone’s feelings this past week. It has caused me to ponder a bit.

In the Filipino culture we are taught at a very young age to pursue our studies to have a better life than our parents have. No matter how “well-off” we were when growing up, it’s not good enough they expect us to live better than that.

My parents have worked hard. I don’t think I grew up deprived of anything. I suppose one could make the argument that although materiality was readily accessible or able to be bought my parents never spoiled us by buying items we wanted just because they could. My parents made sacrifices for us and I have never felt the desire to take advantage of them.

I’m concerned. When have you actually reached “better” isn’t there always something “better”?

My parents have worked hard. Earning every vacation day they took whether in actual time off or dollars. As I sit here looking at their life, I would say they have reached the “American Dream” everyone hopes for. The “American Dream” right…? Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. They have definitely pursued this happiness, they found it freely in Christ. They gained a few extra things along the way: each other, 3 children, a home, a car for each driver, healthcare ( I had to throw that out there, sorry)…

Since I think they’ve reached the “American Dream” I want to know…”Have they enjoyed it?”

Everyone talks about delayed gratification. Putting off pleasure and happiness now and trading it in for sweat, hard-work, and tears. So what is the time limit of delayed? For a child, it may be graduating from High School or college. For the college student, it’s graduating from college and getting that first job. For the young adult, it’s vesting in an IRA. Do you notice how the time stamps never end? There is always one more rung on the ladder to step up to.

When is one able to enjoy his accomplishments? For the Senior, it may be the summer before starting college. For the college graduate, it may be the summer before adult responsibilities kick in (or maybe 6 months after graduation when the student loan bills start marching in). That’s when it stops though, the time. Maybe I should say that’s when time snowballs. As soon as the first bill comes in, adult life snowballs: “How do I pay this bill when I’m still looking for a job?” The questions and concerns never end.

So tell me. When does one enjoy? Does it take a medical scare to jar us from our delayed gratification goals? Does it take a family member’s death to shake us to what is really important in life? Does it take a fire to burn down all our possessions to realize we never enjoyed our “props” in the house.

So I ask you today: leave the housework for tomorrow and spend time with your children. Take a break and pick up the phone and call your parents. Sit in front of the computer and Skype with your cousin. Drive 3 hours on Saturday to visit your aunt. Write the letter, the 2 page hand-written letter you said you were going to write ages ago.

If you die in your sleep, your housework will be done by someone else but one cannot hug your child for you. One cannot write the letter you said you were going to. One cannot be ‘you’ as hard as they try.

CHRISTMAS: Got to mix things up a bit… Part 3 of 3

 

Read first post HERE

Read second post HERE

CHRISTMAS DAY.

At Cousin J, Cousin Jo, and Cousin Jul’s house. They are losing their house 😦

 
 

The Ladies...

Smiles

Aw, precious ... Their wedding is in July.

Eating

They had time to fall asleep ... lucky!

Now… the purpose of the 3 part post of Christmas day.

The Mystery Machine.

This van used to be ours. I remember car-pooling in that miracle van since 3rd grade. We extended family used the miracle van for all of our excursions. It held ALL of us. In later elementary my dad gave it to my uncle. I completely forgot about the van until it made a miracolous appearance 🙂

Of course we needed to take a picture with it!

Did I mention we love to mimic Forever 21 poses?

Apparently some of them are still on the Forever 21 pose.

For these next pictures… you’re going to see the angle change. In order to get the van with everyone in it and to have the flash actually make an effect on the picture my sister had to place the camera in the middle of the street. By the way, the “town” we were in is called Richgrove; population: 2000 approximate. My cousins happen to live on the last street of the town.

So camera in the middle of the street my aunt is watching for any oncoming cars. It’s supposed to take 3 pictures on self-timer.



#1 Self Timer picture

#2 Self-timer picture

#3 Self Timer Picture

Maybe now you know why I’m so random and crazy, kind of 🙂

 

CHRISTMAS: Got to mix things up a bit… Part 2 of 3

Missed the first part? Read here!

Continuing on from my last post…

Now everyone wants to go outside. Play some basketball. Etc.

I’m looking for my boots to join them… I can’t find them! I see other brown boots that are NOT mine.

I give up looking and stay inside to join the older folks with the karaoke. (I hear you: typical.)

They also went caroling without me. (New tradition)

 They went next door and were given $4 for their crooning serenade.

Such manners… as they relayed the information my bro J took the money. Cousin Ry yells “SCORE!” as they’re walking away… Someone also adds “JACKPOT!” to the shouts of surprise and thanks…

Apparently, there were some cute guys in the audience mix. To console myself by missing the cute guys sighting… I say… “Oh well they’re [Cousin Jul & sister D] still in college they’re probably like 19s.”

Cousin Jul: No! They were in college. Cousin J saw them to!

Cousin J: Yeah.. they were cute.

Cousin Jo: MAN! I missed it.

Me: Were they black?

Cousin Jo: You like them bros?!

Me/Cousin J: Duh, she dated a black guy for 2 years…

Cousin Jo: dude! I didn’t even know you like them bros!

Me: Uhm, yeah! Lol. FOUND OUT! Hahaha.

Somehow the conversation steered back to the cute guys.

Cousin Jul: I didn’t even notice them because an old guy answered the door and there was little kids running around.

Me: How do you know it’s not their kids?!

Cousin Jul: It’s probably their cousins!

Me: Oh no. I’m not signing up for no baby mama title.

Cousin Chuck: Oh yeah.. that’s what they were looking for. Good thing you didn’t go Mel.

Cousin Jul: You guys are so messed up!

And with that conversation we wrapped things up at this house and proceeded to say our goodbyes, hugs, and “see you tomorrows” to everyone…



Packed up for the next house. It was 7:30 pm.

And what did we do?

Can you tell we love taking pictures together?

Cousin J and Cousin Jo

Sister wanted to be in the picture too!

When the tripod is setup; more people can get in the picture

 

Yes, we are weird and random. Ok, just me 🙂

 

At this house we continued our gift opening from this family.

We continued our caroling to random people (my cousin’s friends).

One more post left 🙂

CHRISTMAS: Got to mix things up a bit… Part 1 of 3

Christmas eve day.
Arrive in Bakersfield at 1:30pm.

Eat. (The most important part) (Of course, after I hugged everyone and their mother)

My cousin Toby showing us his madd piano skills.

Paused for a picture.


Sing and goof around. (My auntie provided the entertainment of goof around-she fell back against the chair she was sitting and was conveniently caught by the plant and the wall.) Needless to say, only 2 precious souls tried to help her get up while the rest of us were stuck cackling in our seats.

After setting her straight. I mean the chair straight.

Ugly sweater contest. (New tradition)

Supportive Audience

 

 

Ugly Sweater Contestants

White Elephant Gift Exchange.

 

Prepping for gift exchange

Hard at thought. Which should I choose?!

 

 



My bro J gets the gag gift! Girl's hott pink swim shorts!

We hit a lull. It felt like it was 10 pm. It was barely 6:30 pm.

 

I mean THEY hit a lull 🙂

 

We were soon revived with Pinta time. (New tradition)

Here comes Benjamin Franklin.

Getting into candy ready positions.

The first batter up... CHARGE!

CHARGE!

CHARGE some MORE!

Happy with our prizes!

**Notice some knee stains?

Gift Opening.

 

Gathering around...

Showing off our AERO shirts.

Excited about our mugs!

 

 

Happy Happy

 

To be continued…